Xta Joseph Blog

5 signs you’re in a toxic relationship

Okay so I know the reason you’re actually going through this post is that you’re either pondering if you’re in a toxic relationship, or you’re here to prove that your relationship isn’t toxic!!! Lol…. Either ways, I’m here to give you all the assurances you need to prove and to warn you of TOXIC relationships!!!

And oh, just so you know, this post applies to both genders not subjected to the females only. The “he” refers to both he and she….Yea right, we all guilty too 😉

A lot of people fall in love with the wrong people at the wrong time and this sets a pace in their relationship as certain types of behavior starts to play in and affect their love life at the long run. The worst part is the fact that you have no idea that you’re actually in a toxic relationship and it’s draining your mental health and you need to take a break and just BREATHE!!! So let’s look at 5 glaring signs that shows that you’re in a red and it’s time to back out!!!

1. HIGH INSECURITY LEVELS: Here, the insecurity levels are higghhhhh!!! Like you literally can’t be yourself apart from with your partner. You can’t go out with your friends unless your partner approves of it, and when he lets you go out, he’d be video calling you every time to be sure you’re still with your friends, he questions every thing you do and wants to know every one you’re talking to. he wants you to spend more time with him than with your family and friends…. And oh, just know that this list could go on and on because he never trusts you. And a healthy relationship should be built on trust and not some military rules and regulations 😑

2. HIGH CONTROL LEVELS: Okay, so I know you want to be submitted and devoted to your partner and all, but if he’s so in control of every part of your life, then it’s time to set some boundaries love. Relationship shouldn’t be a prison hole you’re sentenced to for the rest of your life. It should be a safe space where you can literally be yourself because you know your partner loves you regardless of your flaws. When you can’t quit your stressful job because your partner cares much about the job than about you, you can’t eat your fav snacks because he thinks it has high calories and a bite could make you obese lol, you can’t watch your fav movies because he thinks the movie is old and his fav actor isn’t part of the movie cast….Then darling, you need to know that he’s being controlling and he needs to STOP!!!

3. EMOTIONALLY ABUSIVE: Most lovers don’t know this is a toxic trait but it is and it actually is the worst. The fact that your partner knows your love language is gifting and then sends you money bouquet of flowers and Gucci bags just to make you change your mind and easily forgive him everytime he cheats on you, or he knows you love him so much you literally want to hear from him everyday so he chooses to ignore you for week whenever things don’t go his way in the relationship so as to punish you…lol…. This screams TOXIC on 7 different languages and Hun, I think it’s time to let him go

4. MANIPULATIVE MUCH: I know you think literally almost everyone is quite manipulative in their relationship but I promise you, it’s not true. You can’t claim to love someone and you’re a pro in gaslighting them at every single chance you get into thinking that every cancelled or failed dinner or date is their fault, or the reason you didn’t text or call them back was their fault. It’s so wrong. A man who loves you would never manipulate you into doing things his way or saying sorry when you’re the victim and not the villain. If your man does any of these manipulative traits then you need to know that you’re in a toxic relationship and it’s either he changes or you let him go.

5. YOU’RE NEVER ENOUGH: A relationship where you’re been treated like crap or trash is a toxic one. No one should ever make you feel like you’re not enough and they’re doing you a favor for dating you 😞😤. If you constantly have to beg to be seen, heard and loved in a relationship, then you’re still clearly single and it’s time you make that official or he will. Men love women who are confident in their selves and know their worth. Do not ever lose your self in a relationship because of any man or woman.

Like Lori Harvey will say “Always remember that YOU ARE THE PRICE”. This should set a pace in your relationship and how you should be treated and loved. And when you feel like it’s giving toxicity, then it’s time to set boundaries and let go of him. Remember, toxic people affects one’s lifestyle and mental health and you don’t want to be drained for the rest of your life.

You deserve good loving, care, support, happiness and peace in your relationship and if that’s not what it’s giving, then you need to switch things up 😉

Thanks for reading!!! I hope this helps and give you the right insight into love and relationship world. Subscribe, like and comment for more tips ❤️

5 hot tips to get rid of pimples fast

Pimples are very common in the skin of many and this can be really frustrating to treat. Results shows about 85% of people suffer from this acne issue at some point in their lives which may lead to a lot of frustration and break out.

What is Acne: Acne starts as a result of break out dead skin cells which is caused when the pores in your skin get clogged with oil. Note that, there are many other factors that causes acne issues such as genetics, diet, stress, hormone changes and infections.

If you are reading this post because you have tried all remedies but the pimples still seem sore and hard to get rid of, which can be really annoying, then not to worry, because I’ve taken my time to write out this 5 hot tips to get rid of pimples just for you.

1. Application of Aloe Vera: Aloe Vera is a tropical plant with leaves that produces clear flourish gel. It contains urea nitrogen, cinnamon acid, lupeol, salicylic acid and on which fights bacteria that causes pimples

In between the leaves of the plant, it has a gel that when applied, it helps to reduce inflammation in the skin and research also shows that this is the most sourced remedy for getting rid of acne issues such as pimples, rashes, cuts and burns. So guys, if you looking for a quick remedy to say goodbye to those annoying pimples, try using an aloe Vera gel.

To Apply – Get an Aloe Vera gel from a good store or super market or make use of the plant itself by applying it on the affected area 1 – 2 times per day.

2. Reduce Stress: Yes, yes, yes!!! You heard right, reduce stress. I know this might be new to you, but it works like magic. Research has shown that high rate of stress causes acne issues such as pimples. So if you a workaholic, you need to take a chill pill and try out some relaxation techniques such as going for a spa session, getting a good massage, taking yoga classes, chill out with friends at a beach, laugh out more, change your lifestyle and stay happy and relaxed as this really really helps in dealing with your pimples. Thank me later.

3. Application of Apple cider vinegar: Now, Apple cider vinegar is made by fermentation of unfiltered pressed apple juice, and it is a great and reliable method of getting rid of those annoying pimples.

Apple cider vinegar fights against different types of bacteria with the use of its organic acids such as succinic acids which helps in controlling inflammation of the skin. Trust me guys, it is reliable and Trusted.

To Apply – Get an Apple cider vinegar from a verified store or super market, mix it with water and gently apply to the skin with the use of cotton balls. Rinse after 5 – 20 seconds of application. This process should be repeated 1 – 2 times per day.

4. Application of Green Tea: Hey! If you new to this, try it and you would be awed by the results, because Green tea has high antioxidants which can fight bacteria if applied directly and correctly to the skin.

Multiple research carried on this has shown that applying a 2 – 3% of green tea extract to the skin, significantly reduces sebum production and this helps to kill pimples fast. Try it out and see for yourself.

To Apply – Get a good Green tea from a super market, put it in a hot boiled water for 3 – 4 minutes, then leave it to cool off. After that, you make of cotton ball to apply it to the skin, after it dries, rinse the skin with clean water. Make sure to repeat this process 1 – 2 times per day for better results.

5. Prevention Process: You know what they say right? “Prevention is better than cure”. Curing acne issues can take so much process mostly if you not using the right remedy to it. It gets really frustrating. So its really advisable to try everything you can to avoid further acne issues such as;

– Try as much as possible not to pick your pimple because this can lead to inflammation and more infection which can spread out causing more pimples on the face or skin. So dear, if you’ve formed a habit of picking your pimples thinking you can cure it yourself, please stop it quickly so as to put an end to your acne frustration.

– Also resist the urge to squeeze the pimples every time it pops up. This leads to skin irritation and causes scars and black spots on face. So dear, try resisting that urge to deal with it manually and save your precious face from harm.

– Lastly, avoid using scrub or strong face cleanser. Almost everyone fighting against acne issue fall for this and end up causing more harm than good to their skin. This is because this scrub or strong face cleanser has serious acidic ingredient that may be too much for your skin pores to carry, thereby causing irritation and inflammation to the skin.

So dear readers, I’m sure by now you’ve gotten full information on how to get rid of those annoying pimples fast, so try them and tell me what the results are. And please note that after taking all these precautions and useful to tips and you still can’t see good results, please I’d advice you go see a good dermatologist to personally help get rid of your Acne issues.

I hope these hot tips were helpful. Thanks for reading, and feel free to comment your thoughts below.

Have a lovely day 💖💖💖

5 things not to get your man for his birthday

Birthdays are beautiful celebrations most people look forward to every year. We tend to go extra mile in making sure we make that day a memorable one for that one person we love so much, mostly in terms of showering of gifts.

We also try not to go overboard in getting unnecessary stuffs for that person because our aim is to see that person Happy and fully celebrated. So, in order to stay on check, I’ve written 5 things not to get your man for his birthday.

1. Boxers: Okay, so boxers are common things most girls gift men on their birthday, but recent research has found out that this gift gets accepted but less appreciated.

First of all, its wierd and awkward to give a man an underwear… Lol. He won’t complain about it tho, but he will feel a bit embarrassed at it, wondering why out of all the beautiful items in the world to give him, you chose an underwear. So ladies, if you’ve made this mistake before, its fine, it can be corrected as birthdays are celebrated literally every year, so you get another chance coming up, be prepared.

2. Cheap perfumes: First of all, not all men likes perfumes a lot. Research shows that 70% of men are perfume freaks. So if you’ve studied your man and you know he also likes perfumes, then yes, its good to gift him a nice perfume for his birthday.

But be careful not to gift him a cheap perfume because they smell cheap and can barely last for hours. And since your man loves perfumes, he would have so much style, taste and preferences in scents, so its so easy for him to tell that you got him a cheap perfume for his birthday. And yes hun, it kinda makes him feel less valued.

3. Art: Arts comes in different forms, e.g canva, souvenirs, sculptures, etc. These are amazing works made by talented artists to express words, stories or lifestyle. Now, gifting an art work to your man is a nice stylish thing, but I’ve got questions for you.

Will your man understand the value contained in it?, Does he like art?, Does he understand art?, Will he really appreciate it?. These questions are vital because not all men understand art. Some just admire it, but they don’t really value it. And knowing that these artworks are mostly expensive to buy, they would rather you used the money for something else than a piece of painting. So love, before you spend that much money on it, answer those questions up there. And if yes, then go for it. If No, aunty, pls buy something else.

4. Oversized shoes: So you might want to switch things a bit when it comes to gifting him with nice footwear. Getting your man a really nice shoe for his birthday is a lovely decision, trust me, but when it all goes wrong is when you get him the wrong size of shoes, trust me, its a total turn off.

Most times, you think you know his size, and then go ahead in buying those shoes based on assumptions, only to find out later that you made a huge mistake and then you’re torn in between trying to return it to get the appropriate size and apologizing for your errors. He might act fine with it, but deep down, he feels you didn’t know him too well to get his size and this makes him feel less valued as well. So before paying for anything next time, be sure about the appropriate size so he feels loved and appreciated.

5. Flowers: So lastly, this is a huge and important mistake ladies make on his birthday, they start out by giving him a bouquet of beautiful scented flowers. To you, its romantic, but to him, its weird.

This is because flowers represents soft romantic gestures made to women to impress her and stir up feelings, so its kinda weird when its the other way around. So ladies, please take note of these little little things, because in the end, “the little things matter”.

Also, note that all these listed are only based on taste and series of researches. The most important thing before you decide on gifts is to know your man pretty well, know his love language n’all, so you can be able to decide perfectly on what gift to make him smile and feel loved and celebrated.

Thank you so much for reading this, I hope it was helpful. If you have any questions, feel free ask me. And also, don’t forget to follow this blog for more interesting posts, like, comment and share as well.

Have a lovely day 💖💖💖

– Xta Joseph

5 main signs that you’re falling in love with someone

First of all, I want to start by saying love is a beautiful thing and the feeling it gives is amazing.

Sometimes, some people find it hard to believe they are actually falling in love with someone. They deny the feelings and ignore the reasons till they get stuck in love somehow and start wondering if this is real

Lol… Just know this is absolutely normal and that is why I’ve put up 5 main signs that shows you’re falling in love with this person.

1. You can’t stop thinking about this person: Okay, so you know that moment when you kinda feel absent minded every single minute. Like when you in the kitchen, doing the dishes and smiling at yourself…

Lol. Or when you watch romantic movies and you place you and your partner as the main act in the movie and start getting all emotional at every touching scene… Lol.

Or when you hear romantic songs or music such as Ed sheeran – perfect, and you start getting all emotional thinking about your partner….

You find it hard to concentrate on yourself without tryna check up on him or her, calling and texting them and looking for ways to make them happy…

Oh dear, its obvious that you’re beginning to fall for this person and this feeling is absolutely normal

2. You are very Happy: When you’re in love with someone, sadness is far from you because, everything around you seems to impress you and make you happy.

Like you can be stressed out from work and not feel a thing, pressured and get pissed at but it doesn’t matter because everything around you begin to look so simple and easy to you.

The clouds are so bright, the stars and moons become your best friends, the world becomes beautiful in your eye as you begin to appreciate nature. You can relate with this right?… So its obvious hun, that you’re falling in love.

3. You get unnecessarily jealous: Yes, you read right. Unnecessary jealousy is a good and basic sign to look out for that you’re in love because you get pissed when the person is talking with someone else all the time. Even if their closeness is just work based or school based, you still get jealous of the closeness and kinda wish their communication will end someday… Lol… This is love.

4. You can’t stop starring at them: When you see this person in a gathering, public place, events or meetings, it’s hard to wink without starring at them uncontrollably.

You stare at them so much that you seem to have noticed everything about them like – how they talk, laugh, smile, their personalities, weaknesses, likes and dislikes, clothings and accessories, etc.

Like unconsciously, you seem to have detailed all these down in your head and later realize it…. Lol, you not stupid or crazy. You’re in love.

5. Attached: Okay, so this is a very good sign because at some point of this whole saga, you start to feel really attached to this person.

Don’t be worried. Like I said, its normal. Because, you start to see through their eyes and read their mind and every expression. You can also sense what they want, their pain, happiness, sorrows, troubles, weirdness and all. The beautiful part is you not only sensing all these, but also feel the need to share it with them. Just know that this is Love.

Now, if you’ve noticed any of these 5 signs listed above, just know that you in love with this person and embrace it instead of ignoring it.

If you feel this feeling is one sided and you don’t know if this person feels the same way about you… Then check out my next post on signs to know if he/she is in love with you

Thank you so much for reading this on Xta Joseph Blog. I really hope it was helpful. Please feel free to like and comment your thoughts on this on the comment section below. I’m also open to answering your questions as well. Have a lovely day.

– Xta Joseph